Marital Talk

Yesterday…no wait, let me back up… I am a big sissy when it comes to pain.  And, when I pack for a vacation, I never ever ever ever pack a razor that’s loaded.  That means, I always put a cover on the darn thing or I just throw that one away and take a new on fresh in the pack.  But, this trip, this trip I was in a hurry.  As if anyone was going to need to shave in the freakin 20 degree weather.  But, anyway, I packed a loaded razor.

With that loaded razor, I also packed my make-up.  Yea, you see where this is going don’t you?  I was digging my make-up which, why did I bring make-up, who wears make-up when it is 20 degree’s, but hey, I wanted at least one photo of me where I looked like a blimp with make-up as opposed to…well whatever the opposite that might be…

Anyway, I was digging in the overnight bag and pulling out make-up.  I’m not a big made-up girl, I mean, I’m a big girl, a really big girl, but not when it comes to my make-up.  Anyway, how am I getting off track so easily.

Anyway, I pulled out the base, check, the powder, check, the brush, check, the blush, check, the eye liner….eye liner…..where’s that eye liner……I can’t find the eye liner…….

Ok, put the other stuff down, insert hand into overnight bag, dig for eye liner and WHAM!  Just like I have envisioned it would be, I cut the frickin’ daylights out of my index finger on my right hand. 

Ok, no problem, where’s the…….crap, I didn’t bring band aids because…who needs band aids in 20 degree weather….?

I wrap my finger, finish with the eye liner AFTER Boy Genius dug it and the razor out of the bag WITHOUT chopping off his finger…….we leave, finger is still bleeding like mad, what am I?  A stuck pig?

We go in the office at the condo, lady only has these itty bitty band aids that might have been ok for my 4 year old’s pinky toe but not for my big girl finger. 

So, we wrap 3 or 4 around here and head on our way.  We stop for an 18 dollar box of band aids (no really, they didn’t cost 18 bucks but with the cost of everything else around here, it wouldn’t have surprised me).  I put on one of these monster band aids (yea, my husband knows I’m a big girl) and that was the end of it. 

Then, a few minutes ago, Boy Genius says to me, "Did you change your band aid today?"

What?  Change the band aid?  My finger hurts and the less I mess with it, the better it feels, no I’m not changing the band aid.  "Yea, you have to change the band aid" he says.  Ok, fine get me another one of those monster 18 dollar band aids.

When he returns, I pull off the other monster 18 dollar band aid and show him my finger.  This is where he yells, "you filet it…gross, ugh ugh ugh, I’m gonna throw up, ugh, ugh, I didn’t want to see it, ugh ugh, gross, gross, you filet it"

And, I was laughing my arse off.  I suggested that, "I figured if you were bringing the fresh band aid you wanted to see the damage".  To which he replied, "Yea and the next time I have a hemorrhoid I’ll show it to you!"

Whoa!  Hemorrhoids and razor cut fingers are so not the same thing.

Yea, that’s right, we skipped the pool today.  Never mind that even with an indoor heated pool, I just can’t get into it when it is cold outside…don’t know why.

But, today has been one of those really odd days because…..I never went to sleep Sunday night and then last night or rather around 2:30 this morning I took a sleeping pill so I could go to sleep.  I’m not sure why I’m having such extreme difficulties with insomnia but I am. 

I have a wonderful husband and only because I have a wonderful husband, I slept finally.  He took the boys to the game room (which trust me was like heaven for him as well as them) while I slept off some of the sleeping pill and managed to get some rest.  I arose around 2:30 this afternoon when they returned.

Yes, that’s what you call a good husband people.  The man is amazing, miraculous and I am very lucky to be married to him.  Our children don’t have a clue how lucky they are to have a father who is as intelligent, loving, and thoughtful as theirs is.

I am about to take my insomnia induced headache to bed because he is trying to sleep right here beside me and I think my pecking on the computer is keeping him awake…OOPS!

See, I’m not near as good of a wife as he is a husband…

This is a photo from the wedding we shot a few weeks back…I thought since I was admiring my own husband in this post, this photo would be appropriate as well…

I haven’t abandoned the ol’ blog here.  I’ve had my head underneath a pile of work of another kind.  You see, first of all my cousin, the baby of the family got married.  She asked me to do the photographs.  I wasn’t to excited about it but figured I could do a decent job.  And, we did. 

But, then…when we got to rehearsal (we wanted to see what was going on because we don’t do this all the time so we weren’t familiar with a lot of what was going on), she asked me to be the Director.  Yea, I can do that.  As a matter of fact, I like telling people what to do so, hey, sure, I’m game.

Then, the day after the rehearsal (which was a week before the wedding), she shows up at my house with some blank programs that she had purchased and the name of the wedding party participants.  She didn’t however have anything else written down nor did she know what she wanted the programs to say……so….sure I can do that.

That took me a full week.  Then, the wedding came and it took me the last two weeks to get the photos edited.  I have to be a brag butt and share my 3 favorite photos…..I’m fairly certain that I’ve already posted these but I really do like them so…hey, you are gonna have to look again…..

Ok, well, this is more than 3 but when I got started… I didn’t know where to stop….the first 3 are my favorite 3 but there are really more that I like a whole lot….if I have to say so myself…

not your traditional pictures by the way…..my favorites I mean…they aren’t your traditional wedding photos for the most part…they are either poses I dreamed up or saw on someone’s website….

this was staged by the way…they really weren’t that bored, lol

I love this photo…if I can figure out how to get that darn set of drums out of the background…argh

now some others that I really really like…

And, since I’ve shared so much of this, let me tell you, she walked down the aisle to "Butterfly Kisses" by Bob Carlisleinstead of the wedding march.  The groom pulled the red carpet out for her on the first verse, we opened the doors on the first chorus and then we edited out the "sweet 16" verse and she walked down the aisle to the following words….

She’ll change her name today.
She’ll make a promise and I’ll give her away.
Standing in the bride-room just staring at her.
She asked me what I’m thinking and I said "I’m not
sure-I just feel like I’m losing my baby girl."
She leaned over…gave me butterfly kisses with her mama there,
Sticking little white flowers all up in her hair
"Walk my down the aisle, Daddy-it’s just about time."
"Does my wedding gown look pretty, Daddy? Daddy, don’t cry!"

Oh, with all that I’ve done wrong I must have
done something right.
To deserve your love every morning and butterfly
kisses-I couldn’t ask God for more, man this is what love is.

I know I gotta let her go, but I’ll always remember
every hug in the morning and butterfly kisses.

If you’ve never heard the song before, get a listen here:

And, then, when they were introduced as Mr. and Mrs….they left the alter to the Beetles song, I’m a Believer…

I thought love was only true in fairy tales
Meant for someone else but not for me.
Oh, love was out to get me
That’s the way it seems
Disappointment haunted all my dreams.
Then I saw her face
Now I’m a believer.
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind.
I’m in love
(uuuuuu)
I’m a believer, I couldn’t leave her
if I tried
I thought love was more or less a given thing
The more I gave the less I got,
What’s the use of trying
All you get is pain
When I wanted sunshine I got rain
Then I saw her face,
Now i’m a believer.
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind.
I’m in love
(uuuuuu)
I’m a believer, I couldn’t leave her
if I tried
Oh, love was out to get me
That’s the way it seems
Disappointment haunted all my dreams.
Then I saw her face
Now I’m a believer.
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind.
I’m in love
(uuuuuu)
I’m a believer, I couldn’t leave her
if I tried
I’m a believer

If you participated in the contest here on my blog, please shoot me an email indicating whether you got your prize or not so that I can double check everything and hopefully get everything taken care of before I leave on Sunday for a short vacation.

I’ll have my laptop with me but I’d rather get this all taken care of before I leave.  I so what to recognize all the sponsors one last time before I end this….if it weren’t for the sponsors…there wouldn’t be a contest….

Glow Mama

Adorn Me Jewelry

Happy Panda Baby

Mom on the Rise

My Sweety Room

Lisa Leonard Online

AK Designs Studio

Plain White Press

Treasures Par Avian

DesignsbyRS

Stacey Kannenberg & CedarValley Publishing

Susan K Jewelry

Busy Body Books

Skin Care RX

List Plan It

Kllycat

Coco Zen

Heidi at Silpada

Tiny Prints

Bella Button Designs

Charles Orlando

Bustling Baby

Bitty Bum Boutique

Unbridled Books

Brain Child Magazine

Mom Spark

Analiese

Family Travel Gear

Knowledge Adventure

Jewelstreet

Miss-Britt

Shops at 24 Seven

South n France

Peachbutt Designs Studio

Eclectic Candy Cane Cards

Just Bubbly

Eebee

Jimi

Sunshine and Ravioli

Mama Mio

Pretty Cheap

Little Brown Pen

Usborne Books

Motive

Mommy Bracelets

Oranje

My Precious Kid

Sara Bennett

Thanks again to everyone!  Merry Christmas!  Happy New Year!

*I have a Christmas tale to tell of all tales!*

*UPDATED* I’m not sure how or why my cousin was offended because I meant no ill will toward her. She should know by now that I am crazy about her. However, when I stated below that she was “hassling” me about the photos, she felt like I was mis-representing her. She sent one text message about them. I was the one who was obviously excited for her to see them. I was so excited that I didn’t sleep all night after her wedding because I wanted to upload the photos and edit them. The faster I did that, the faster she would get her copies. And, our internet is regulated by a FAP (fair access policy) so I can only download that much during the hours of 1 AM to 6 AM…otherwise I lose my service for 24 hours. Anyway, I meant no harm and I apologize to her for thinking that I was trying to be rude.

Do you think they might look a wee bit tired?  It was one long day for me and really from the point of "will you do my photographs" through the will you direct, will you do these programs part…..I was exhausted.  And, well, I didn’t spend all week at the church decorating nor did I spend months and months planning.  So, I know they were tired.

They are home now and harassing me for photos so I"m working hard to get them for her…….

I’ve handled this little wedding and I had some wonderful posts from Robyn and I greatly appreciate her stepping in and helping me.  It wasn’t very easy for me to even keep things going at home and with all my contests and getting things done at home.  And, just as we were trying to get all things together and making it work, my oldest son got a stomach virus.  Luckily I didn’t have it yesterday.  Jace had it today and hopefully I can continue to avoid it.

My mom left today going to visit a terminally ill aunt in Florida and so obviously she won’t be here for Christmas and that will be tough.  I’ve only been away from my mom once or twice at Christmas that I can remember and those weren’t easy holidays for me.  This should prove interesting too.

So, now, I’m going to throw a few of my favorite wedding photos at you and then we will get moving again……….And, if you want to see most of the full set, you can see them on flickr.

Yea, gotta freshen your breath right?

The beauty of her dress and her ring…

And, she has taken all of dad’s money…

But, she did need a prayer..

And, the best man thinks those other guys might be messing with the wrong girl…

Time to admire her….

And, well, let’s admire him too..

But, the bridesmaids will NOT let him make an escape

And, the matron of honor has to get him again…

And, the ring bearer is offering up a ring for the bride too..

Mom is giving the Groom the lo down…

The 2 little ring bearers have had ENOUGH

Bride and groom ….

A little tug of war….

And some cake? 

Ok, how much more are they suppose to take of this ………?

I know those aren’t your traditional poses and yes, we got those, these are just some of my favorites.

Honestly, I could go on forever with my favorites but I think those are the best ones.  I am however going to share a couple of my favorite poses from their engagement photos that I made.  They are the two in my banner up there and I’ll get that changed soon…..

Will you marry me?  (I guess I gave these to you backwards uh?

But look how precious…

He does admire her though…

Aren’t they an adorable couple?

Will this ring do?

Ok, what about this one?

Yea, she’s happy …..

And he is glad she does….

Here we go…..all answers are in the archives of Mom~E~Centric, not any other of the many blogs I write or wrote.

Here’s the reminder of how it works:

1.  I will post a trivia question with each item.  Answers that can be found in my archives.

2.  The first person to reply on THAT post for each question correct will win that particular prize.  There will obviously be multiple prizes each having it’s own trivia question from my archives.

3.  The contest will run through Tuesday December 16th at Midnight.  If there are questions unanswered at Noon on December 16th, I will start dropping hints every hour until all questions are answered.

4.  If any question is unanswered by midnight on December 16, I will use Random.org to pick a winner from all the wrong entries for that particular question and giveaway.

5.  I will notify the winner and the sponsor as soon as the trivia question is answered correctly that way the sponsors can possibly get your gift to you before Christmas.

6.  All winners will be notified for the final time on December 17th.  I do want you to know that the USPS  says that December 11th was the last day to mail to guarantee delivery before Christmas, so keep that in mind.

7.  You can win as many times as you can answer correctly and you can enter as many answers on each question on each day as possible. (Remember, if the question is unanswered at midnight on December 16th, I will use Random.org to select a winner.

This is the final day of my December Give Aways, so the questions are a little harder, but the answers are definitely in this blog, in the archives, somewhere.  Don’t give up, if no one gets the questions correctly, I will use Random.org to choose a winner.

The first Gift on Day 15 is the Christmas Bow Collection from BittyBum Boutique, and they look a lot like this….

The first person to answer the following question:

How did I suggest that spam got started?

The next gift is The Wonder Singer by Unbridled Books 

This book goes to the first person to answer the following question:

Why did Mini Me not get to play T-ball or basketball this year?

The next gift is Omega Body Oil from Mama Mio 

This gift goes to the first person who can answer the following question:

What is the name of the restaurant where Boy Genius proposed to me?

This next gift is a $50 Gift Certificate to Baby Time Bags.  You can use the gift certificate to pick out anything you want, but here’s a peep at what I would buy…

and it goes to the person who can answer the following question:

What was I most upset about losing when my purse was stolen?

The final gift and question of the 2008 Give Away Season.

The gift is a one strand bracelet, valued at approximately $65 from

Mommy Bracelets, here is a sample,

and it goes to the person who can answer the following question:

What is the Name & Website of the person online that I have had the longest relationship with and it has remained an on-line relationship only?

Here we go…..all answers are in the archives of Mom~E~Centric, not any other of the many blogs I write or wrote.

Here’s the reminder of how it works:

1.  I will post a trivia question with each item.  Answers that can be found in my archives.

2.  The first person to reply on THAT post for each question correct will win that particular prize.  There will obviously be multiple prizes each having it’s own trivia question from my archives.

3.  The contest will run through Tuesday December 16th at Midnight.  If there are questions unanswered at Noon on December 16th, I will start dropping hints every hour until all questions are answered.

4.  If any question is unanswered by midnight on December 16, I will use Random.org to pick a winner from all the wrong entries for that particular question and giveaway.

5.  I will notify the winner and the sponsor as soon as the trivia question is answered correctly that way the sponsors can possibly get your gift to you before Christmas.

6.  All winners will be notified for the final time on December 17th.  I do want you to know that the USPS  says that December 11th was the last day to mail to guarantee delivery before Christmas, so keep that in mind.

7.  You can win as many times as you can answer correctly and you can enter as many answers on each question on each day as possible. (Remember, if the question is unanswered at midnight on December 16th, I will use Random.org to select a winner.

So, let’s get started.

The first gift for Day 14 is a customized mouse pad from Miss-Britt.  It goes to the first person who knows….

who originally designed Mom~E~Centric (her name is all I need, I do not need her link)

The next gift is a copy of The Problem with Women….is Men:  The Evolution of a Man’s Man to a Man of Higher Consciousness

This book goes to the first person who can name the Prime Time Actor that I am MOST "in-love" with.

The next gift is a copy of the book, Conscience Point by Unbridled Books,

and it goes to the first person to name

my all time favorite Reality Show?

The next gift is from The Shops at 24 Seven, they call it a Pig in a Blanket but it looks more like this…

and it goes to the first person to name the last blog I Guest blogged for?

The final gift today is a Tote Bag from Bustling Baby that looks similar to this….

this gift will go to the person who can tell me the following:

What are the nick-names (I used these nicknames in my post) of my 2 childhood/teenager friends that I am still close to that both have all boys?

Remember if no one answers correctly, I will use Random.org to choose a winner from all the wrong answers.  So, it never hurts to chime in.  And, the answers are all right here in the archives of Mom~E~Centric

Here we go…..all answers are in the archives of Mom~E~Centric, not any other of the many blogs I write or wrote.

Here’s the reminder of how it works:

1.  I will post a trivia question with each item.  Answers that can be found in my archives.

2.  The first person to reply on THAT post for each question correct will win that particular prize.  There will obviously be multiple prizes each having it’s own trivia question from my archives.

3.  The contest will run through Tuesday December 16th at Midnight.  If there are questions unanswered at Noon on December 16th, I will start dropping hints every hour until all questions are answered.

4.  If any question is unanswered by midnight on December 16, I will use Random.org to pick a winner from all the wrong entries for that particular question and giveaway.

5.  I will notify the winner and the sponsor as soon as the trivia question is answered correctly that way the sponsors can possibly get your gift to you before Christmas.

6.  All winners will be notified for the final time on December 17th.  I do want you to know that the USPS  says that December 11th was the last day to mail to guarantee delivery before Christmas, so keep that in mind.

7.  You can win as many times as you can answer correctly and you can enter as many answers on each question on each day as possible. (Remember, if the question is unanswered at midnight on December 16th, I will use Random.org to select a winner.

Ok, so the first Gift is from littlebrownpen on Etsy.  She is offering a $10 Mix and Match Offer - 3 for $10 for……….

the first person to name all four of my family members by their real first name, not their nickname?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next gift is a copy of the book, The Problem with Women…is Men:  The Evolution of a Man’s Man of Higher for the first person to answer

"how many times did my husband mow our grass this (2008) summer?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next gift is the 2 Books, The Snowy Day & Princess Things to Make & Do by Usborne Books for the first person who can identify….

which one of my children said, "Ok, I don’t want ‘em, Mom will you rub my feet?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next gift is a $20 gift certificate from Skin Care RX for the first person

who can name the Major Auto-Immune Illness that I was diagnosed with this (2008) summer?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next gift is from Unbridled Books, a book entitled In Hovering Flight for the first person who

can name the kind of business my husband and I owned?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next gift is a Holiday Gift Pack from  Kimberly at Motive for the first person who can answer the following question…

I don’t get "passionate" about much, but I do have a passion for something, what is it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next gift is this bracelet

from Peachbutt Designs Studio

for the first person who can name MY favorite drink?

*******************************************************************************

Ok, that’s it for Day 13………the answers are all in the archives right here on Mom~E~Centric.

Hello

So, you know that we’ve successfully run a "12 Days of Christmas" Give Away on Mom~E~Centric, Mom is Teaching and on Education Uncensored.

Naturally I saved some of the best for last and Day 12 really won’t disappoint, I promise.

Moreover, I have enough products from very gracious people and company’s that will be given out in a "Mid-December Blow-Out".  This will last for December 13, 14 and 15. 

These three days will see the following go to a few lucky winners:

Mix & Match Stationery from Little Brown Pen 3 for $10,

Book entitled The Problem with Women…is Men (2 of these as a matter of fact),

Book entitled In Hovering Flight,

$20 Skincare RX gift certificate,

Holiday Gift Pack from Motive,

Bracelet from Peachbutt Design with an approximate value of $60

Personalized Mouse Pad from Zazzle,

Book entitled Conscience Point,

Pig in a Blanket (teddybear and blanket),

Tote from Bustling Baby worth approximately $50,

Book entitled The Wonder Singer,

Christmas Bow Collection from Bittybum Boutique,

Mama Mio Oil,

Baby Time Bags offers a $50 Gift Certificate

Mommy Bracelets offers a gorgeous bracelet

Usborne Books (2 books - Snowy Day & Princess Things to Make and Do)

Looks good doesn’t it?  Spread the word….enter early and enter often!  This gives the sponsors of Days 1 - 12 an opportunity to win something too!

I’m giving you the links to temp you, to lure you, to prepare you…..this contest won’t work like Days 1 thru 12 has.  Here’s the rules…

1.  I will post a trivia question with each item.  Answers that can be found in my archives.

2.  The first person to get the each question correct will win that particular prize.  There will obviously be multiple prizes each having it’s own trivia question from my archives.

3.  The contest will run through Tuesday December 16th at Midnight.  If there are questions unanswered at Noon on December 16th, I will start dropping hints every hour until all questions are answered.

4.  I will notify the winner and the sponsor as soon as the trivia question is answered that way the sponsors can possibly get your winning to you before Christmas.

5.  All winners will be notified for the final time on December 17th.  I do want you to know that the Post Office says that December 11th was the last day to mail to guarantee delivery before Christmas, so keep that in mind.

Otherwise, all I can say is GOOD LUCK!  And, let’s see how well you know me.  By the way, this "Mid-December Blow-out is only being run on Mom~E~Centric and answers received on any other blog besides this one will not count.  But, I will be promoting the contest on all of my blogs, so please, don’t get confused.

Happy Holidays!

Jerri Ann

It’s no secret among my friends that I’m a crafty individual. Most evenings I can be found sitting on the couch, either a crochet hook or knitting needles and some yarn in my hands. I make gifts for others, but most of my craft time is caught up in making items to donate to charity.

With an impending wedding, I thought long and hard of ways I could make our day a bit more crafty to reflect my personality in a unique way. The added bonus I’ve discovered? It’s saving us thousands of dollars to adopt a DIY approach!

So what have I done so far?

I’m crocheting all the flowers for the bouquets and centerpieces. We’re being married outside, so we don’t really need any ceremony flowers, which is a nice bonus. And I’m not so much a flower person, more interested in other aspects of the day. So when I started to figure out how much bouquets, corsages and boutonnieres were going to cost, I panicked. And then I started doing research.

I found a pattern for a crocheted rose, which I’ve altered slightly for my uses, and hit my local craft store. For under $100, I should be able to make enough flowers for my bouquet (all white), The Monkey’s boutonniere (also white), and all the bridal party flowers. I’ll also have all the flowers for the centerpieces for the tables done! It doesn’t hurt that I’ve got a Mother-In-Law who knows how to attach said blooms to stems!

We’re having a non-traditional guest "book". Instead of spending a ton of money on a book for guests to simply sign their names into, we’re doing things a bit different. I’m picking up a mail box and some spray paint (in one of our wedding colors) at the hardware store and making it festive. Then, a few pens and some pretty paper laid out on the front table, along with instructions to write us a little note, is all we’ll need to have some great notes to read for the next few days! People can also place cards in the mail box, and in the weeks after the wedding I’m going to put all the notes into a photo album (I’ll cut the paper to 4×6 size to make this easy). I also hope to put a picture of the guest that wrote the letter with it, but that may be a pipe dream!

I’m repurposing my mom’s hair piece. While her hair piece is larger than I’d normally wear in my hair, there’s a section of it that’s absolutely gorgeous. I’m going to take that section and wear it in my hair. Since I’m wearing my hair partially down, this piece will hold some of my hair off my face and add my "something old" to my day!

Speaking of my mom, she’s making me necklaces for all the bridesmaids (and for me)! An avid beader, we found some gorgeous baubles that will each be unique to the bridesmaid. The perfect thank-you gift, these bad boys will be something they can wear for years, and will speak to the personality of the wearer.

We had a friend design our invites. I found a great source for printing invitations (Vista Print!), and so we had a friend, who is in school for graphic design, work up our invitations. They’re now totally unique to us, and we’re getting them at a fraction of the cost of store-bought invites!

Hopefully, as we get closer to our wedding day, we can find more ways to be crafty, creative, and save some money! What are some ways your weddings were crafty and creative?

Robyn is guest posting at Martial Talk from her regular blog Craft and Found. (www.craftandfound.com)

********************

I’m only adding this because I am in the process of helping with my cousin’s wedding.  I was originally suppose to do the photography.  Then I became the director.  Then I became the program designer and printer.  Then, I became the burner of music on CD.  Then, I became decorator……here’s a picture I did, I just feel the need to share because these guys are adorable.

The final Christmas Blow - Out will start on Saturday, December the 13th.  It will then go into Sunday December 14th and finish up on Monday, December 15th.

All winners will be announced as soon as possible as contest ends on Tuesday Night, December 16th at midnight Central Time.

Don’t miss out!!!!!

My fiancé and I are attempting to do something no other couple has done before (at least, that’s how it feels). We’re attempting to plan our wedding without going into Wedding Debt. Many couples will take any money generously given by parents, and then add to it using their credit cards and savings accounts in order to plan their special day. But early on, The Monkey and I agreed that we didn’t want to start our marriage with any more joint debt than our house. Because we both already have personal debt, we were positive that getting through our wedding day on just the money we were gifted by family would be a good test of our budgeting and our ability to remember what we felt was most important and not get all caught up in the details.

We’re now halfway through planning the Big Day, and I’m more grateful than ever we made this decision. It’s helped us to keep from agreeing to seemingly small things that could break our budget, and forced us to stay focused on the parts of the day that we consider most important.

Our budget is approximately 1/3 of what most wedding magazines will tell you is the average amount spent on a wedding in America today. Knowing that we were working at a seeming disadvantage, we immediately implemented these strategies and ideas to help us wade through.

1. We focused on what was most important. For us, this was having an intimate ceremony, and then being able to have a big party, full of drinking and dancing and even some karaoke thrown in – each of these things representing part of us and our relationship. This meant we’d want tons of pictures, our close friends around us, and a DIY feel to the day (I’m a rather crafty person) to represent both of our personalities best. Keeping these two pictures in our heads has helped when suggestions and ideas pop up, or we’re faced with a "this is something you HAVE to have" comment.
2. We’ve let the rest of the details get put on hold, or adjusted to fit what’s left of our budget. If it didn’t fit directly in with one of our two main goals for our wedding day, it’s been put on hold. That means things like table decorations, jewelry and accessories, and even guest favors are being either ignored completely or done in a much less expensive way. Items that tend to be big-budget, like flowers, will be done by me, in order to cut costs a ton.
3. I didn’t buy stacks of wedding magazines to look through. I was lucky to have a friend get married at the beginning of our engagement, and she gifted me with a few of her bridal magazines and books, but we’ve largely ignored what the industry says we should be doing. This keeps us away from thinking about what we "should" have, and focused on what we truly want our day to look like.
4. We worked through the major details in record time. By getting the hall picked out, the ceremony site reserved, and the photographer, deejay and attendants all nailed down within the first month of our engagement, we were left with all the major decisions handled and a ton of time to breathe. Attacking the wedding planning in this way forced us to make quick decisions, and has given us the gift of not having much planning to do during the holidays.
5. Finally, we’re keeping the Day-Of schedule as loose as we can. By watching most of my friends get married, I’ve learned that the more scheduled and set your wedding day is, the more money you’re going to spend to keep it that way. The only items we’ve got to be at by a certain time are our hair appointments and the reception itself. Because the wedding is so small and we’re being married in a park, the time is fluid. This makes pictures fluid, and most of the prep time fluid as well. While this is definitely less stressful, it also means we don’t have to spend a ton of money on day-of wedding planners, cars to take people to and from sites to ensure their prompt arrival, or delivery companies to get items like flowers or the cake to their designated spots.

The plan isn’t fool-proof, but thus far we’ve managed to use these five basic concepts to keep from having to dip into either our savings or our credit cards. What are some of your thoughts on sticking to a budget and keeping your wedding debt-free?

When not guest posting for Marital Talk (http://www.maritaltalk.com/three-months-to-go/) Robyn writes at her blog Craft and Found (http://www.craftandfound.com).

Most people will tell you horrific in-law stories. Either values don’t line up or personalities conflict in major ways, but it seems everyone has at least one in-law they can point to as a reason in itself not to get married. But I’ve gotten extremely lucky when it comes to my future in-laws. The Monkey’s parents are wonderful people and have already taken me in like another child in their family. We’re past that "must impress the new person" phase as well, so I’ve really started to get to know them for the people that they are, and while I’m sure there’ll be the typical family spats in our future, I’ve got high hopes that we’ll be one big happy family from day one.

I’d thought The Monkey would have a similar experience with my family. And, while for the most part he has, this past Thanksgiving’s trip to meet my ENTIRE extended family proved to be a test of his strength. Literally.

There is a long-running joke in my family concerning a male suitor of mine and chopping fire wood. It dates back to junior high, when I had a crush on a boy who helped my father split up some wood in our back yard, and has hung around as a humorous anecdote. My father has joked that before I get married, my fiancé will have to split firewood to prove he’s worthy. Enter our trip to visit the family, and my grandfather’s back yard full of trees they’d just had cut down.

The jokes immediately began flying through the phone and e-mail, and The Monkey geared up for what was sure to be a test of his strength and worthiness. In reality, everyone went outside early Friday morning and, with the help of a power log-splitter, chopped up the three trees that had already been cut down. We did get a few pictures of The Monkey ceremonially chopping a few logs, which he did wonderfully and in the full spirit of the day.

I’m just thankful I didn’t have to pass a similar test to be considered part of HIS family!

When not guest posting for Marital Talk (http://www.maritaltalk.com/three-months-to-go/) Robyn writes at her blog Craft and Found (http://www.craftandfound.com).

Because we’ve lived together already for two years, I assumed that when The Monkey and I got engaged we’d be able to make a rather seamless transition to fully sharing our finances. Most of our bills were already paid together, with only our personal debt and spending separated.

Apparently I completely underestimated the difficulty merging finances would cause, and I’ve learned a few things along the way. For those of you out there who are already married, feel free to add your tips and tricks into the comments.

First and foremost, I learned to assume nothing. While we both have been open about our debts, I learned that I didn’t have a definitive figure in mind when I sat down to approach a shared finances discussion. To me, knowing fully how much debt the other has was the first step towards creating a shared budget and figuring out how our money would be handled differently once we were married.

I learned very quickly that The Monkey wasn’t as comfortable having these conversations until we were actually married, a stance I found strange. But we decided to begin the conversations on budgeting and finances before the marriage license has been signed, agreeing to leave definitive numbers out and talking more in terms of general ideas and divisions.

This is where I ran into the second road block. I assumed we’d share all bills, and only have separate accounts for spending money. To me, this made sense as we’d be able to pool our finances easier, divide and conquer our debt easier, and really get things paid off faster. The Monkey, on the other hand, had assumed we’d keep things basically as they are.

With these two road blocks discovered, we’ve sort of stymied when it comes to money. We’ve agreed to combine more of our debt, although there are a few things that are still sticking points, and we’re stuck on how much spending money we should each get.

Because I have a decent idea of how much debt we’ll be combining together once we’re married, I’m pretty comfortable with leaving the conversation where it’s at for now, although I know many couples who didn’t walk down the aisle until they had all this stuff nailed down.

So what do you think? What are some good ways to approach money in marriage, knowing that finances are usually the biggest and most frequent fights in a marriage? Are there compromises I’m missing or thoughts I should hold fast to?

Robyn is guest posting at Marital Talk from her regular blog Craft and Found (www.craftandfound.com)