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Abuse Victim Help

by Jean Lockwood

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 Among the women I know, there are a few that I know have either been abused in their own homes, or are being abused in the relationships they are in now. They have moments when they want out, and then they have moments when they think the abuser is really changing- so they stay. They walk on eggshells so they don’t tick the abuser off- trying to avoid making him or her angry, pretending everything is ok now. After all it hasn’t happened in a few weeks, or maybe a few days. The victim has a way of idealizing that can be deadly. They know the pattern is simply repeating itself. The abuser seems to change, saying he is sorry, being nice for a while- as long as the victim behaves herself. But eventually he will get angry again, or maybe just have a couple of drinks. He will once again begin the abuse. Not that it ever really ended, it was simply following a pattern.

When an abused person wants out, she needs to make a plan. There are things she can do to prepare for a sudden departure.

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If you are a victim of abuse, and you want to get out- here is a wonderful website you can look at to give you tips on how to make a plan and keep yoursef, and your children safe. Click on this : Domestic Violence and Abuse. There is a detailed list of the things you should be prepared to take with you. Having a kit made up ahead of time is a wise decision. You could ask a friend to hold it, or use a suitcase and hide it in a closet. The main thing is to begin making a plan now, before it is too late and you have to leave with nothing.

If you are not sure if you are being abused, read April Gilford’s blog, How Do I Know If I Am Being Abused?

Please, if you are a victim of abuse, seek help. Don’t become a murder victim.

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Marriage is one job that has the ability to make us love it, hate it, adore it, and despise it all at the same time. Here at Marital Talk you will see discussion about marriage concerns, marriage joys, humor, Q&A, marriage and family, and of course romance and intimacy. Join in with comments or questions and discuss what's going on in your marriage.

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