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Love and Marriage

by Jean Lockwood

Love and marriage, love and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage

Can’t you just hear Frank Sinatra singing this good old song?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=KyQtitfozIo&mode=related&search=
(check it out!!)

Love and Marriage. If only it were that simple, right?
When we fall in love, we think “WOW! This is IT!!”
And then we expect to always FEEL like we we are in love, and never be bothered by anything the other person does, or doesn’t do.
Then after the honeymoon, sometimes soon after, sometimes not- reality sets in.
We are suddenly aware that the one we love is NOT perfect after all. As a matter of fact, they are FAR from perfect.
The cute way our spouse talks or the silly things they do, may suddenly irritate us to no end, or we may notice things that were DEFINATELY not there before we married them.

The wake up call can be rather startling, or it may be mild- but sooner or later every married couple has to face it-
They married an imperfect person.
How do we handle it?
There are many options- and not all of them will benefit the marriage.
I will begin with this piece of advice that has gotten Dan and I through the not so perfect times:
LOVE IS A DECISION!
When your spouse is suddenly unlovable- decide to love anyway.
When you have had a fight, and no apology is in sight- decide to love anyway.
When the socks are still on the bedroom floor, after reminders and nagging- decide to love anyway (and leave the socks there).
When she comes to bed with gunk on her face- decide to…well..you know.

My point is this: When we decide to continue loving our spouse, even in the hard times, we grow and so do they. Our marriage takes a turn- a right turn.
With each step of growth a marriage takes, it becomes easier to make those loving decisions.
I am not talking about ignoring things that may need attention.
I am talking about deciding to take actions of love, and have a loving attitude- even when you aren’t feeling love at the moment.
Love is a decision, and sometimes the only decision that will pull you together instead of tear you apart is the hardest one to make.
Decide to love.

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Posted in General on July 24th, 2007

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Marriage is one job that has the ability to make us love it, hate it, adore it, and despise it all at the same time. Here at Marital Talk you will see discussion about marriage concerns, marriage joys, humor, Q&A, marriage and family, and of course romance and intimacy. Join in with comments or questions and discuss what's going on in your marriage.

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