Marital Talk

I think I have a fairly secure system here.  Yes, we’ve had a few problems, don’t let anyone tell you that they don’t.  But, the fact of the matter is, prior to last Christmas or so, we really had never had any issues at all.  We simply snap together and work it.  I think what happened last winter was a huge wake-up call for both of us and now we can continue with making marriage work for us.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve tried it a total of 4 times now, and I know a bad one when I see it.  When I read blogs online when women are discussing their husbands being abusive verbally, it rips at my very gut.  When I read blogs where women discuss the emotional and physical abuse they they endure for the sake of their children….I wonder how hard could it be to see through the clutter and the plain ugliness of it all.

I’m fortunate that there were no children involved in any of my marriages until now.  I think I was very fortunate to find a man who was childless as well.  We were roughly 34 and 33 years of age and most folks have at least had one child by that age and very rarely to those who haven’t find a partner that’s childless.

I was a step-child and I know exactly how difficult it is.  I was a physically, emotionally and verbally abused step-child too.  I am not just playing with words here when I tell you, I KNOW HOW IT FEELS.  And, I know how it feels to wonder why exactly your parent tolerates such nonsense.

I mean, I know my mother loved me.  I  know she knew he was abusive to me because he was equally abusive to her.  So why would she let that continue.  It took a really big scene for her to discover what was happening right before her eyes.  And, even still, I wonder sometimes. 

Anyway, I didn’t start this to write about that, I started it to tell you what a wonderful man I have.  Yes, he has his faults and well, ok, if you make me say it, I have faults too, but over-all, I think we make a pretty good match. 

I just thought it was time for a good story instead of stressed one and then I had to go and throw in the step-children stuff.  Oh well, just remember, good marriages do exist.  Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.