Marital Talk

Anyway, I just want to say that I am no idiot.  I’ve made the horrible blogging mistakes of calling the grass orange.  I’ve done my best to repair that wrong and I have no ill feelings toward the grass for expecting me to clear up the matter.  And, I’ve made mistakes by using humor that simply wasn’t understood.  And, I’ve made mistakes in my choice of words sometimes, possibly saying that the ugly grass is orange.

So, what I’m saying is this, a bad choice of words, the bad use of an adjective like "ugly" and the pure unadulterated lie in situations like purple sky’s and orange grass are simply not even on the same page.

So, some people live by the philosophy that "this is my blog and I’ll say what I darn well please on it and I don’t care if it is offensive to you, Mr. Purple Sunshine or Mrs. Orange grass".  And, others like me, prefer to keep things calm and cool.  People make mistakes, people make bad choices when it comes to calling the sun purple or the orange grass ugly. 

This particular kind of of mistake is more what I refer to as a blooper.  A slip of the tongue if you will.  The other is lying. 

You see, that is a third application to the whole subject.  But, the bottom line is this, it is my blog, I will post what I want and when I want and I expect each and every blogger out there to do the same.  However, I expect any misuse of adjectives by me or any blogger elsewhere to be corrected when brought to the attention of the author.  No real apologies needed unless you are a true southern belle like myself and feel it is necessary, but, it is plainly excusable.

But, to lie about someone and then say, "It’s my blog I can write whatever I want and if you don’t like, then don’t read it", well that teeters on a bad attitude in one sense and even starts to spark the thoughts of words like libel and slander.  You can’t just go around telling your story the way you want to tell it when other people are involved especially when you aren’t telling the truth.

Really, you can’t.  So, my challenge to you Internet’s, if you have offended someone in 2008 with a bad choice of words (or just adjectives) or you have posted or commented somewhere and put up mis-information that you KNEW was wrong when you did it, make 2009 the time to go repair that. 

It’s a hard thing to do, but knowing that you’ve righted a wrong is way bigger than anyone’s ego.  Trust me, I was the offender in a a couple of situations.

And, with that, I want to say, if you think I’m talking to you in this post, you may or may not be correct.  I’ve been blogging for almost 9 years in one way or another.  I write on approximately 8 blogs a day and comment on close to 30 or 35.  I understand blog etiquette.  If you blog and you don’t understand how it works, ask someone. 

And, if the idea that I make money off of my writing is offensive to you, I’m sorry, but I ran up on this quote and it basically sums up how I feel about the issue of monetizing blogs…

“It should feel genuinely good to earn income from your blog — you should be driven by a healthy ambition to succeed. If your blog provides genuine value, you fully deserve to earn income from it.” (Steve Pavlina)

Let’s just put it this way, as quotes seem to go, "if you can’t  say something nice, it is probably best not to say anything at all".  I’m going to end this post with a very important issue regarding this whole subject.  Internet trolls, stalkers, what ever you choose to call them are real.

If you have the occasional troll and you know there’s no harm intended, then ignoring seems to be the best course of action.  If you have an Internet stalker on the other hand and you feel that you are in real imminent danger, then by all means, take the necessary precautions.  But, if you don’t know all the details of a situation like this regarding someone else, don’t post about it and magnify the problems.  And, finally, if you think for one minute that you are immune to being outed to your family, your friends, you parents, you employer, you need to think again.  And, if you post any situation on your blog but simply can’t seem to find a way to put your finger on where or how you received your information, it might be best if it is left un-written.  Because trust me, if you post about me and I know part of it isn’t true, you can be damn sure I’m going to be asking where you got your information.

Furthermore, if you don’t know what it means to be "Dooced" then look up the word Dooce, because it reads something like this…

"To lose ones job (fired) because of something you have publicly posted in a blog. The most common usage of the word is dooced (eg. she was dooced). The word dooced was coined in 2002 by Heather Armstrong, a Los Angeles Web designer who lost her job after writing about work colleagues in her personal blog, dooce.com."

And, while some of you sit back and laugh because someone else has been "dooced" (and not necessarily in a job situation but in a friend, family, spouse, etc,) beware, someone is probably plotting your own demise while the laughter rolls from your belly.

You know, the other old saying, ‘What’s good for the goose is good for the gander"  and let me tell you something, I’ve been the goose and I’ve been the gander.  But, I’ve learned my lesson. 

Be responsible for your actions, take responsibility for the words you put on the Internet.  Think about the consequences.  Think about how it looks and feels to outsiders.  Yea, just try to think first.  Like I said, I learned that the  hard way.

To Be Continued…..Part Three - coming up next